Where in the World is Cat?

Yesterday was another beautiful day in Moscow. I took the day off from my internship to work on my thesis, and to run a few errands at the institute.

I usually wake up early and have to wait for my bus to come to bring me to the metro, fight the masses of people in the metro, and then make it to work in the center of the city within a hour, an hour and a half on a bad day if there's traffic. So, yesterday, I enjoyed a relaxed morning and relished in the fact I wouldn't have to fight anyone in the metro.

I breezed through the usual bureaucracy at my university, and though it ended up taking me the whole day, I went home with everything I needed (exam dates, thesis deadlines, graduation date - my institute has a don't ask, don't tell policy. You don't ask, they'll never tell you what you have to do or when.) I even received comments that I looked refreshed, got compliments on my new haircut, and enjoyed some small talk with a few acquaintances that I hadn't seen in a while.

I stopped into the Office for International Students to ask one of the assistant directors a quick question. This particular woman met me on my first day at my university, when I was wide-eyed, nervous and completely lost. A surprisingly pleasant conversation ensued, during which she remarked to me, "Katya, you look so changed. You look wonderful. Kazhetsa, Rossia tebye idyot." It seems, that Russia suits you.

When this phrase is used, it is usually used to describe the way a piece of clothing or haircut compliments a person. "Eta maika tebye idyot." That shirt looks good on you.

Russia suits me?

That phrase has been swirling in my head since then. At first, I took it as a compliment. I left the institute walking on air, proud that I was able to get through a day of bureaucracy without fights or squabbles, that everyone in the institute understood me, respected me, was even kind to me. I was proud to have gotten to that point after two years of struggles and fights (both with others and myself), wins and losses. Proud that I had learned not only how to survive, but thrive in Russia.

Then, almost as quickly as I had obtained this nirvana-like state, it all crumbled. I came home to a message conveying more complications with my American diploma equivalency (without this, I can't get my Russian diploma) and issues with some membership cancellations that might pose a risk to my credit. In dealing with these headaches, all the bad memories started to flood back - hours and hours wasted studying and toiling for non-existent tests or waiting in line just to ask a professor a question, only having access to a laundromat once-a month, getting sick repeatedly, being treated poorly or taken advantage of by Russian acquaintances, a broken engagement....and I thought....Russia suits me?

I've said it many times, Russia is a complicated place. Everything about it is complex...its history, culture, politics, people, way of life.....it all seriously challenges a person, and will continually put you in the position of questioning just who you are. There are very few societal norms here, the country is lost in a transition between old and new, traditional and modern, and therefore, you must decide for yourself just how you will act. You are just as likely to get berrated for doing something you think is right as you are to be encouraged to do something you think is wrong, and vice versa. So, the question you must ask yourself when you are living in today's Russia is, if you allow yourself to be encouraged to so something not necessarily right, what will that be, and if you're going to get in trouble, what would you be willing to get in trouble for?

In short, who are you, and what do you stand for?

There may be new cars crowding the streets and Dolce and Gabbana on all the girls in Moscow, but Russia as a whole is a wild West of morality, waiting to be pioneered.

So, yea, in a way, Russia suits me. Living in Moscow has helped me gain a better sense of myself. I now value certain aspects of my life more than I did before moving here (such as my own health and my family), and take other aspects less seriously (such as meeting other's expectations, or, just what "doing the right thing" means). I also am a heck of a lot more comfortable in my own skin. But I also know now that I'm an American, and no amount of Russification or living abroad will change that, and it's time for me to return home for a bit.

Russia suits me. But only in the way that a special shirt or tie you wear once and a while when the mood strikes; In a way that allows you to make a statement of who you are.

It's mid-April, and things in Moscow are blooming. The sun has been out at least half the week (a miracle for Russia), temperatures are warming up and more and more people can be seen walking leisurely on the streets. I leave Moscow in two and a half months, and with the city showing her other half, I was starting to regret leaving so soon.

Then I was reminded what the people here can be like year-round.

After a day at my internship and a couple hours of sitting at my desk working on my thesis, I needed a break. So I decided to run to the university gym, which, according to their schedule, is open to 11pm. I usually go late, I'm a procrastinator, it's my style to give myself just enough time before the gym closes.

So imagine my surprise, when at 10:35pm, in the middle of my third kilometer, the lights in the gym are suddenly shut off. Yes, I am the only one in the gym, but it's only 10:35pm. The gym is still open another 25 minutes. I defiantly finish my third kilometer, grumble under my breath because I wanted to run at least five, and take ten minutes to stretch. While I'm stretching, I notice the trainer poke his head in the gym four or five times to see if I'm gone. I'm downstairs by 10:45pm, giving my locker key in, and ask the receptionist:

"Excuse me, do you have a new trainer upstairs in the sports room?"

The receptionist smiles, and answers, "I don't know, I'm new myself."

Not wanting to give this girl a bad day at the beginning of a new job, I ask politely, "Well, is it possible to speak to one of your managers then?"

The rest goes as follows:

Receptionist: "Why?"
Me: "Because I would like to discuss something with her." (I know the manager, she is very nice.)
Receptionist: "Is there something wrong?"
Me: "Yes. I was on a treadmill upstairs, and the trainer shut the gym and turned off the lights while I was still running. He didn't even warn me."
Receptionist: (Looking at the clock) "Well, it is 10:45."
Me: "Yes, but you close at 11pm."
Receptionist: (The typical Russian "so what?" stare.) Silence.
Me: "You think it is polite to shut off the lights in a room when someone is running on a treadmill? Wouldn't you at least warn the person?"
Receptionist: (Typical Russian shoulder shrug and blank stare.)
Me: "Well, it's not. If you would please, let your manager know of the incident. I'll be sure to remind her myself." (I don't know why I said this, it will make no difference anyway.)
Receptionist: "Fine." (Also knowing it won't make a difference.)

So much for the endorphine high after a good workout.

I don't care how beautiful or fun Moscow is. This is not a place for sane people to live!

In all senses of the word. I've been thinking/writing/reading about my thesis and its subject material for months now, and it only consumes more and more of my thoughts and time. I've got a approaching deadline (just over a month) and believe that just typing the random thoughts in my head is what must be done to hit my 90-page minimum. The mountain of books and photocopies next to my desk is almost as high as the chair I sit in, and my bookshelves are full. I'm beginning to feel like I live in one of the unorganized/unkempt offices of my professors. I always wondered why they couldn't keep things tidy - now I know! A person's living space is truly a reflection of their state of mind.

Weather's been crummy, everyone is sick, and as life usually tends to do - am getting slammed with work after a month and a half of nothing to do. I need a nap.

So, after CNN (who noticed this after me), the local English news channel, Russia Today, picked up the clip of the Liberal Democrats presidential candidate fighting with the campaign manager of the presidential candidates for the Democrats (just Democrats, not Liberal...big difference here). Anyhow, though I posted this clip yesterday - this one comes with the blessing of English subtitles. Watch, laugh, and then remind yourself that this country has nuclear weapons, is a G8 member and wants to enter the WTO. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qvw_pEzmA08

Okay, so, I'm hoping this happened because it's a slow news day. Anyhow, the other day a television debate was held between the two meaningless Russian presidential candidates. Well, one of the candidates, and the other candidate's campaign manager. Yea, a little unconventional...but just watch. http://edition.cnn.com/video/#/video/world/2008/02/28/vo.russia.studio.brawl.ap

Since returning to Moscow a few weeks ago, I've noticed some change since I first arrived in August of last year. Most of these changes are positive, and this gives me hope for the future of this country and her people.

So, this weekend was the first time in a year that I can remember having more than enough time to get things done. Of course - I didn't get the things that needed to get done finished, but I did get many odd jobs done that I'd been putting off. That seems the way with everything.

My Internship at Moscow Carnegie Center
Anyhow, life has slowed down a lot since I've gotten back and it is a welcome change. Thinking with a straight head is a new thing for me - those of you who know me well will be relieved to hear this (the rest of you will just find it funny). My internship at the Carnegie Moscow Center is going well, work is slow (I want to meet someone who aspires to be a librarian), but there are conferences and seminars during the week that are very interesting to sit in on. Additionally, the Center is located on Tverskaya Street, right across the street from Pushkin Square, and all kind of events take place there. Just this Thursday we hosted a delegation of representatives from the Carnegie Center for International Peace in Washington, DC, and this was enough to provoke a protest from a few ultra-nationalists. It was more funny than scary - most of these people have no understanding of the situations they protest against, and the delegation was in town to speak with human rights representatives from the Russian government and to hold a seminar on the US elections. (Let's me just mention here that if it were not for such delegations/meetings, these people wouldn't even be able to hold their demonstrations without being harmed or throw in jail.)

We're gearing up at Carnegie for more such protests as Kosovo is getting ready to declare independence and has the support of the US. (Russia supports Serbia, and does not want Kosovo to declare independence.) Being a US-funded organization is not a wonderful thing in this instance, though we are only a think-tank, many "mistake" us for the US Embassy and protest outside our doors instead. Anyhow, I get a good view of it all from my view in the library - though I do have to crawl up on my desk to look out on the window (and do, often - as I did to take the picture above.)

Russian Presidential Elections
The Russian Presidential Elections are coming up very soon - March 2nd. It's hilarious to me that Russian government officials even bother to call them democratic. Dmitri Medvedev named as the favored successor by Putin himself in the fall, and the other candidates are all but on the Kremlin payroll, running as opposing candidates as a formality.

However, I do like that public service advertisements are everywhere encouraging Russians to vote. This campaign poster, which is at a bus stop right outside of the MGIMO dorm, reads "We vote as a whole family". I do think encouraging responsible citizenship and high voter turnout is important, though in this case it is important to the Kremlin not for holding democratic elections, but for lending legitimacy to a illegitimate campaign. Even if they don't have to rig the elections literally to get a win for Medvedev, the whole process is a formality - politics here is highly personalized - when a president with an almost 70% approval rating says, "Vote for this guy", it's pretty sure that a democratically complacent society will do just that.

Living in the MGIMO dorm
Well, now that I'm back to cooking in the dorm, I'm getting more creative. I arrived back from New York to discover that one of our two poorly-working stove-tops had been removed from the kitchen on our floor. So, we have two working ranges for the 50 students living on my floor. Yea, I think it's time to go out and buy my own little hot plate. However, I've started to experiment with my little toaster oven. Over the course of the last year, I mastered baked and roasted potatoes, baked chicken, pizza, open faced sandwiches and a bruschetta. Now I'm working with desserts. I started this only recently because actually, dessert is incredibly cheap to buy in Russia. Beautiful cakes, tarts, cookies, chocolates and candies are all over Moscow, and are cheap when compared to the price of the ingredients and time needed to make something comparable.

One thing however, than I cannot find in Russia, is a cake of the consistency that we as Americans would normally associate with cake. Cakes in Moscow are a little drier and denser - not the fluffy, moist confections that we love to gobble up on special occasions. Brownies, too. So, while I was home, I invested in some small, disposable foil tins that I could fit into my toaster oven. My hope was to conduct my first experiment before Valentine's Day, but alas today was my first free moment. So, equipped with the Toaster Oven Chef's recipe for Death by Chocolate Brownies (www.toasterovenchef.com) and my Russian ingredients, I made a batch of brownies today. My working space was cramped, but the brownies came out considerably well and I hope that Hot Tamale will agree with me.
This Thursday I'm off to London to visit a friend for a few days over the Russian holiday weekend. I'm getting very excited....!

Ok, so this exact clip didn't make it on, but there were a couple that did, and in the local news...I'll add more here as I find more as I continually Google myself......probably shouldn't have written that for everyone to see!


RIA Novosti - Video: "Americans Vote in Moscow. RIA Novosti video"

Russia Today - Video: http://russiatoday.ru/news/news/20740/video

Anyhow, cool thing is over 120 Democrats living in Moscow came out to vote in the primary. We get to vote abroad, almost like a separate state. Pretty cool, eh? Even cooler since the Republican Party doesn't allow anything like with their members! (Sorry...had to rub it in). The best part for me was helping the Russian-Americans living in Moscow who were voting for the first time - they were so excited to not only be casting a vote for an American presidential candidate, but to be able to do so from abroad. God bless the USA.

Well, the last two months have been a rollercoaster to say the least, with rolling knolls, dips, turns, uphill climbs and then vertical plunges....so, what I'm trying to say is I'm sorry I haven't posted, life has been taking me for a ride.

Fast forward from December's last blog, it's a new year, I'm back in Moscow after a month and a half at home, and now at my internship with Carnegie Moscow Center. (Should you be interested, here's the organization's website: http://carnegie.ru/en/) It's been a slow start, I'm in the library and have been designated with re-cataloging everything (it's a mess...really). Such an assignment to someone with experience in Washington, DC, both in Congress and in non-profits, and who has two degrees is frustrating, but, I'm going to do the job well and move on to better things asap. In the meantime, I've got my thesis to work on, the upcoming presidential elections next month to talk about and five months left in Russia to enjoy.

Yes, I did say enjoy.

Now that I'm not shackled to my dorm room and the campus, or financing for two, I'm feeling quite liberated. Carnegie is located in the center of the city on one of the busiest streets in town. I plan on making the best of this, and started Friday night by visiting TGIFriday's with Hot Tamale*, my Spanish roommate, for happy hour drinks and dinner. (Yes, TGIFriday's...I was excited!)

This past weekend I volunteered at the Democrat's Abroad primary in Moscow, which I will write tons more on as soon as I get some pictures to post about it. Needless to say, I am feeling upbeat and back in the political swing of things.

Speaking of photos, good news! Daddy and Mommy Dearest* (let's admit it, that's how I will always think of them!) got me a new camera for Christmas, so I'll be snapping away and posting pictures again soon. Good things come to those who wait (or have no money to fix their old cameras)!

Well, that's it for today - I must get back to the important job of organizing Carnegie's unused library. In the meantime, be sure to drop me a line and let me know how you're doing!



*In order to more vibrantly write about my experiences, I've started to talk about the people in my life openly. Considering this is the Internet and there are lots of strange people out there (you know who you are), the names of these lovely people in my life have been changed to protect them.

I write this latest entry with the warning that I'm in a bad mood. However, this mood occurs often here and usually for the same reason, which is what drives me to write about it. This entry will be biased, and this having been said, I continue...

There is no respect left in Russia. Very few people respect each other here anymore. They don't respect your time, your status, your faults or your pluses. Russia has over the last 16 years become a land of every person for himself, and this permeates all aspects of life. This is the way it is, and the way life must be for most people if they want to survive. Lying is something you must do in order to get what you need, not to mention the few extra things you might want. The only person that you can respect in life here is yourself, and perhaps your spouse and children...outside of this tight circle sacrifices for the sake of others are neither repaid nor noticed. That's just the way it is.

I write this after waiting a total of five hours over the course of several days for a certain professor at my university who owes me a final grade. I've called, waited in his office and emailed him and yet I'm still without a grade. I'm the only student who completed their work on time (early, to be exact) and translated my Russian work into English for the benefit of the professor.

Yes, I'm focusing my frustration on this one professor. He embodies all that frustrates me about modern Russian culture. Irresponsible, aloof, shows no respect to his students, always late, unorganized...I would stereotype this as typical Russian behavior. The frustrating part is that at the same time they'll be friendly, smile and joke with you, and at the end of the conversation you'll be sympathizing more with them then you are with your own situation.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I don't like Russians, that Russian people are bad, or that Russians are disrespectful people. This type of behaviour is the norm here, and that's more frustrating to me. I'm from a wildly different culture - one strict deadlines, efficiency, mutual respect for one another regardless of the situation, etc....I struggle in this culture. One's not better than the other, it's just they're so wildly different I to this day struggle living in it. I at some point hoped to adjust, but I don't think it's possible!

What bothers me most, is that Russians complain about this. They complain just like I do when someone doesn't do something they've promised, or should have done. But they themselves do this all the time! It affects everyone - people get angry, frustrated, mad, worry...all these negative feelings...but it never occurs to them to change what they do. No one here thinks about changing their behavior, setting an example or correcting mistakes. The response is always, "Well, what can you do?", or "That's just the way things are". Things are so passive here - it is hard for anyone with an active attitude here to succeed...the conditions just aren't right - only if you relate to everything passively will you survive mentally and actually get something done.

Well, just writing with a few updates...

The parliamentary elections are coming soon - December 2nd. They are considerably important for Russia considering that Vladimer Putin will be leading the party list for United Russia - meaning that he is open to the idea of leading Russia not from the seat of the president, but as head of the legislative branch as prime minister. In Russia, this is very remarkable, as the Russian constitution inadvertently creates a dynamic relationship of power between the prime minister and presidency. Considering Putin's high level of approval here in Russia, and the likelihood that he will get elected to the parliament, the odds that he'll be ruling Russia from the seat of the Prime Minister is high. As for likely candidates for future Russian president, who will be elected in March 2008, that remains to be unknown, and at this point, it's unimportant. It is widely understood and rarely contended that whoever becomes president next year will be playing second fiddle to Putin (and that Putin will probably chose this individual anyway).

That being said, I'm ready to come home for a break. The elections haven't occurred yet and I'm already exhausted by all of the "what if's" and prediction-making when really, I'm at a point now where I don't believe that any one outcome will cause a dramatic change in Russia's immediate future anyway. The mood here is shifting further and further from the West, as is the mentality and ideology being implemented. The US played and still plays a large role in this, but that's a discussion for another day.

Anyhow, amidst all of this, I'm still struggling to adapt to Russian life. It's become easier, of course, and one learns how to operate to survive. However, being raised in a country where practicality and efficiency are highly valued, running through endless channels of backwards bureaucracy can really shake one's mental state. It's just hard to do something "the way everyone else does it" when you know there's a better way. But that's just it - it's only the better way to you - to everyone else, the way things are right now are best.

Basically, I need a break.

That being said, I took some of my non-existent free time tonight to change (or at least attempt to change) the look of my blog - since I can't give myself a makeover at the moment, I figure I'd at least afford one to my "virtual" face. Let me know what you think.

Tomorrow, I'm off to a friends to celebrate Thanksgiving. Of course, this will be a Thanksgiving with turkey - but with Russian bulochki instead of dinner rolls, carrot and beat coleslaw instead of Green Bean Casserole, and probably some apple pirog instead of apple or pumpkin pie. The important thing is that I'm getting together with friends and to give thanks for how fortunate I am to be here in Moscow, healthy, with the support of my family and friends.

I hope you're all doing well at home (wherever that is for you) and preparing for your Thanksgiving feasts. I miss you all and look forward to seeing you over the holidays!

It's getting colder here in Moscow. Things are busy, so I apologize that I haven't posted much lately, but a new post is on it's way. My biggest problem is that I have so much I want to write, I can never chose what to post and what not to post! Hope all is well where ever this post finds you! -Cat

So, once again I've caught a cold here in Moscow. The weather has been wildly erratic - warm and sunny, cold and rainy etc, and that coupled with my new old room has thrown my immune system for a loop. What started as a simple cold seems to be attacking my body with all its strength. I've tried a string of different medications - some homeopathic granules my boss suggested to me, Tylenol Cold medication, and even my "miracle drug", Mucinex, has done me no good. So, today, grudgingly I went to the polyclinic, or the student health center.

I avoid going there, even though it's one of the best health centers in Moscow. I avoid going there not because they don't treat patients, but because everyone I know that has gone there, has had to argue their way in. This is typically Russian. Rules are so befuddling that even the people that work the reception desk there don't know what they need to do, so they usually try and put all the work on the students. I had asked about health insurance earlier this week, and after inquiring three different people (in three different offices) was assured that since I'm an exchange student, I don't need to buy any, that I receive my care for free. Wonderful! So, today, I went, Student ID in hand, ready to wait to see a doctor.

I got to the health center, and when I got the reception window, explained that I had been told I didn't need to purchase health care, and that I was sick and would like to see a doctor. The receptionist found my file, and asked for my ID. She looked at the ID, and then told me I needed to purchase health insurance. There is nothing written on my ID but my name, so I have no idea how she deducted this from looking at my picture. The following conversation went a little like this.

Receptionist: "You need to buy health insurance."
Me: "I would, but I've been told I don't need to. I'm an exchange student."
Receptionist: "Are you here on budget or by contract?"
Me: "I don't know. Contract, I guess. I don't pay to be here." (What's the difference?)
Receptionist: "Then you have to buy your health insurance."
Me: "I must be on the budget, because I was told that I do not need to buy health insurance."
Receptionist: "Well, go to the Office for International Students. (20 minutes away) Find out from them."
Me: "I went to them, and they've sent me here."
Receptionist: "Then go to your dean." (Another 20 minutes away)
Me: "He sent me to the Office of International Students."
Receptionist: (glaring at me) "Girl, what do you want?"
Me: "I want to see a doctor! I'm sick! I JUST WANT TO SEE A DOCTOR!!!"
Receptionist: "Room 129" (Throws my file at me) "Bring this with you"

Of course, I think I was a little less eloquent with my demand, it probably came out more like, "I want to see doctor! I sick! I simply want to see doctor!" But that's besides the point.

Here in Russia, getting things done is often a game of who can get the other to give in first. Today I won.

After seeing not one, but two very kind doctors, I was prescribed an arsenal of medications and written an excuse from classes for a week (who knew they still did things like this, much less for master's students?). On my way out, I stopped by the receptionist to apologize for raising my voice at her. She seemed surprised that I would think it was rude to do what I did, and then simply said - "Just ask your Dean if you're here by contract or if you're budgeted. That'll solve everything." Simple. Russians don't think to do this first.

Oh, by the way, I stopped by the Dean's office on the way home. I'm budgeted, just in case you're wondering.

Hello All!

Well, actually, I lie a little in my heading here. I am writing with reason, but I'll get around to that. I have yet to post some pictures of Hungary as promised, and to tell you all a little about my wonderful trip there. That, and I'll elaborate just a little on other goings on here in Moscow.

But first, just a few words about my blog. My main motivation for starting this blog was to communicate with friends and family. Knowing that I would be physically absent for a considerable amount of time from the lives of my family, and that I would be constantly saying goodbye to friends (such is the nature of an international school) I wanted to be able to talk to you all, let you know my thoughts, things that I am up to, and to provide a little picture of my life (oh, and yea - to hear from you guys too! Those little "comment" buttons at the end of each blog really do work!).

However, it has come to my attention that the tone of my last couple blogs has caused some to worry. I do try to avoid politics in these blogs as I do understand that the world has access to it, and the dangers that can come unexpectedly. It is within this framework that I write what I feel, and to do so without provoking such "dangers". I wouldn't write something if I thought it would risk causing anyone, including myself, harm. I may have my criticisms of Russia, but I also have many about the United States as well, and I would not hesitate to print my opinions (politely put, of course) about the US. Russia IS democratic in nature, and I believe enough in the country's ability and current efforts to grow to post such things here.

I do thank those of you that did write me with your concerns, I appreciate your care very much. But please, know that I'm not an aspiring journalist, I'm not a political activist and I wouldn't do anything unless I was 100% positive it was safe. (I have survived a year in Moscow unharmed afterall!) ((Currently knocking on the wood of my desk!))


Having said my share, let's return to the usual light-hearted nature of this website. We're hear to learn and share afterall!

So my trip to Budapest was just absolutely amazing. I know understand why people spend weeks sleeping on trains or in hostels to backpack across Europe. There really is so much to see in our world, and man, I've just begun. Budapest really opened my eyes as to how diverse a place can be - and when I say diverse, I don't just mean the color or ethnicity of the people walking the streets, but by the architecture in the city, nature of a country's history and a nation's ability to adapt to change.

My Hungarian friend and former roommate Paprika did an amazing job of keeping me busy - 5 days of sightseeing, and they were packed! Needless to say, I slept well during my stay as well! We saw everything, from the local sights in Budapest, to museums, churches, nearby Bratislava (the capital of Slovakia) and she treated me to a bit of rural Hungary by inviting me home to her house outside of Budapest for dinner. I could spend all day describing the intricacies of the trip, but I would suggest checking out the new album of photos I created in my gallery instead. I've put up captions, so you'll know what you're looking at. (Just click on my photos in Picasa, upper right link!)

Just a few words on Bratislava. My motivation for going to Bratislava was to visit Slovakia, the homeland of my grandmother's family. I had hoped to visit her mother's village of Nizhni Ruzbahi, but unfortunately the trip would have required an overnight stay and a exorbitant and long (3 hours) taxi ride from the closest bus stop. I haven't given up hopes, just will plan in the future to make the trip when I have a few more, ahem, resources available. However, I am very happy that I visited. Slovak language is so similar to Russian that I understood it almost perfectly, though did not speak Russian in reply, as the slight difference was enough to provoke an old babushka. Apparently despite the strong similarity in language, they in no way want to be associated with the Russians! The culture however was more European than Russian, with obvious influences from neighboring Hungary, Poland, Czech Republic, Ukraine and Austria. The architecture, like in Budapest, was wide in range, but what I enjoyed the most was the Translyvanian feel of the Bratislava Castle (Romania is just three hours away!).

In a strange way though, being in Slovakia, knowing that part of my heritage came from this area of Europe and seeing the strong similarities in culture with Russia, I felt a little closer to Russia - as if it wasn't so strange or foreign as it always seems to me. Guess this is a little hard to explain, but wanted to share it.

Well, I guess I haven't left any room for pictures. This means the responsibility is now on you! Go click on that link! The pictures are beautiful!

So, as you all know, I'm back in Moscow. I'd be lying if I said I'm happy to be here. Don't get me wrong, I will be happy to be here in about a month or so. Things are just difficult to get used to, and although this time around I've got a year's experience underneath my belt, it still is frustrating. It's amazing what we take for granted in the United States, or perhaps in the western world in general. For example, efficiency and preparation. Rationalization. Though everybody's drinking Pepsi, wearing Dolce & Gabbana and listening to Madonna, that's about as far as the westernization in Russia has come. Westernization with only half the modernization, and almost no liberization. (Don't get me started on democratization!)

A typical Russian might be offended by this last statement. They might say, "Who says we want to Westernize?". There has been a significant rise in anti-western sentiment here in Russia in the last couple of years, mostly due to the unfulfilled expectations of peristroika and democratization. The problem is, Russian culture (as I see it) is one that almost inherently goes against the grain of Western culture. They imported music, products, foods, pop culture and politics from the West, but no Western ideology or Western mentality. What results is one big mangled mess of double-standards and incomprehensible rules and laws for the Russians to try and salvage a normal life from. A person can easily have a good home feed their children, but I don't see Russians seeking purpose in life like most Westerners do. Even here at MGIMO, what I'm told repeatedly is the most prestigious school in Russia, money drives everything, even for the students. No one is here to change the system, save Russia or to champion a cause they are passionate for. This worries me greatly.

What has happened to Russia? More importantly, what will happen to Russia? Am I just socializing with the wrong people? People here seem to have lost their will to dream and think big, but rather focus on the material things that they now have within their reach. What will it take to get a nation to dream again?

These are just some of the questions that continually motivate me to continue to study, observe and learn this country and its politics. I have many times wanted to throw my hands up in the air and hop on a plane back home, but something in me just can't leave. Russia is infectious. It has left a mark on me, and for whatever reason, I want to leave a mark on Russia.

This is "hill" on the Buda side of Budapest (this hill would be a mountain to most Americans). The hill is covered with walkways and staircases to welcome visitors. Monuments and statues are scattered all over the mountain, with Hungary's own "Statue of Liberty" crowing the top. Also located at the top is the Citadel, a proud part of Hungary's war history.

The view from the top. That's right - I climbed it! Forty minutes and a lot of water later, Krizsti and I enjoyed the spectacular view. This is looking at the Pest side of the river, which also houses the country's parliament.

Well, unfortunately, that's all I can fit for now. But there will be much more to come, including some stuff from the States this past summer. Keep checking and take care!

Happy Independence Day America!
Though the weather was gray and rainy, today I celebrated the Fourth of July as good as any sunny summer day. I reviewed my Star Spangled Banner lyrics (almost forgotten them in Russia!), did some yardwork to reassure myself that I was still capable of doing tough dirty work, went to the movies and then spent the evening on the State Plaza for a concert and an INCREDIBLE fireworks display with Tomash. Oh, did I mention Tomash was here?! Yes, imagine how happy I am to have my Polish friend in the States! Tomash will be here in Albany for the summer on a cultural work exchange. Needless to say, I'm very excited!

So, I saw just about the most unAmerican movie playing in the theaters, even though it's the Fourth of July, and truly ask that you all go and see it as well. Sicko, for those of you who aren't aware of it, is Michael Moore's latest film on the American healthcare system. It's not as liberal as Farenheit 9/11, and fairly compares our healthcare system with a few other systems in the Western world. It will make you laugh and cry, but most of all, make you really think about our nation's healthcare system and what we as taxpaying citizens deserve and can do to make things better. Please go see this film - I just want you see what it has to offer and to think about it!

Just over a year since leaving DC I've found myself back home for a month and a half, and I'm so happy to be here! I've survived a year of master's work in Russia, which means I'm halfway to getting my master's degree! 11 finals during the month of June and a 12-hour trip to the State and I'm now sitting comfortably back in my OWN room, and my house with my family. The weather's been great, things are blooming everywhere, there's a string of family parties coming up - I feel like I'm in heaven.